May 8: Hard Hearts and Divorce Laws

Scripture: "Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning." — Matthew 19:8

In the "Plan A" of Eden, marriage was a perfect union of two souls reflecting the image of God. There was no provision for separation because there was no selfishness to cause a rift. However, sin introduced "hardness of heart," a spiritual condition where empathy is replaced by ego. When Jesus was questioned about divorce, He pointed back to the "beginning" (Plan A) but acknowledged that the Mosaic Law (Plan B) was a necessary accommodation.

God hates the pain that divorce causes, but He provided laws to regulate it because the alternative in ancient cultures was far worse. Without these laws, men could simply abandon their wives without any legal protection or means of survival. The BRI scholars point out that these were "concessions" designed to protect the vulnerable. God entered a broken social system and placed boundaries around human cruelty to ensure that even in a "Plan B" situation, justice and mercy were present.

Ellen White suggests that God "tolerates" certain things in the short term to transform us in the long term. He didn't endorse divorce; He regulated it to prevent total chaos and the exploitation of women. This is the "Radical Accommodation" of a God who is willing to get His hands dirty in the messy legal codes of a fallen race just to shield a single person from being discarded.

Today, we often mistake God’s "allowance" for His "approval." Just because God meets us in our brokenness doesn't mean He wants us to stay there. He meets us where we are, but His eyes are always on the "beginning." He wants to soften our hearts so that the "Plan B" regulations of law are eventually replaced by the "Plan A" power of love.

If you find yourself in a situation that feels like a compromise of your ideals, remember that God is with you in the mess. He provides the "Plan B" grace to help you survive, but He is constantly inviting you to let Him heal the "hardness" that necessitated the regulation in the first place.

Reflection Questions:

Am I currently mistaking God’s patience with my mess for His endorsement of my choices?

How can I pray for a "soft heart" today so that I move closer to God’s original ideals?

In what ways can I show "protecting grace" to others who are going through their own "Plan B" scenarios?

Sources: Thoughts from the Mount of Blessing by E.G. White; BRI "Marriage and Family."